Who Are You?

We moved to Dallas over the summer and life has been busy.  Jeanne, my sister-in-law, found us a house to rent in their neighborhood.  Ironically, the former tenants relocated to Ohio while we were relocating to Texas.

I am pleased with the new school Gabriel and Christian are attending, and we live in a neighborhood filled with children.  Their cousins, Daniela and Anthony, also attend the same school, although each of the kids is in a different grade.

We celebrated Christian's 9th birthday last month.  He asked, "Mom, will you be sad next year when I turn 10?"  Of course I will, I tell him.  But you're turning into a mature, sweet boy. 

Christian is an old soul, wise beyond his years.  He has a sensitivity that surprises me.  He just realized that he has been interested in science since he was young -- he is curious, inquisitive, and orderly.  "I've always been interested in bugs and different things, but I just discovered that I have always liked science."

As we talked way into the beyond-his-bedtime hour, we pondered what science means. In broad terms, I told him that he's interested in creation --- space, the earth, animals, the human body -- and all that God created for us. And even then there is so much more learn, and how wonderful it would be to be a scientist.

Recently, Christian's class took a survey of their personal interests.  Once the surveys are complete at the school, there will be enrichment clusters for the children to choose from based on their interests, hobbies, or possible career choices.  Christian said he chose three areas of interest, with science being his number once choice: science, writing, and music.  His teacher has a deep interest in science, as well, and yesterday Christian's principal told him that he's going to enjoy learning in Miss M's class this year because "she loves science."   

Christian also noticed some interesting posters hanging on a wall outside of a sixth grade classroom yesterday, and he approached the teacher and asked him if he taught science, too.  They had a short conversation outside while he was waiting to be picked up.  His goal to get into Mr. D's sixth grade class. 

Earlier in the evening, after I had put the kids to bed and while Christian was still up reading, I "snuck" outside to have a quick cigarette that Angie had left for me.  I still enjoy having the occasional cigarette, but Christian caught me. "Are you smoking, Mom?" No! Go back to bed.  I said this with a straight face while hiding the cigarette at my side.  "Isn't that a cigarette you're hiding?"

So I resolved to tell him that I was lying, that I had been caught off guard.  No one likes to hear his parents lie.  And what kind of example was I giving?  I was doing something awful that I preach against, yet I had to be honest.

Christian came into the kitchen.  "Uh, Mom, you don't have to worry about smoking. I know you like to smoke with your friends sometimes, but you need to tell Angie to just quit.  You can do it, Mom!"  It's not my place, Christian.  She's an adult like me and besides, she plans on quitting one day. 

Christian, I said, I should never have lied to you.  "Don't worry, Mom.  I just like to check on you to make sure you're okay."  We talked a little more about my dishonesty and then we talked about science after I was tucked into my own bed reading. 

I know who you are: you're wise enough to know that Mom makes mistakes and the world does not fall apart.  You know you can tell me anything and that we'll talk about everything.  That's who you are.  You are my angel.