Of Boys and Critters: Clean Up on Aisle E13

I woke up one morning to find Gaby in the kitchen "reading" the newspaper while drinking apple juice from a favorite snowman mug. I realized there was much that has happened over the past few months that I hadn't reported on. I've had time over these past few months to reflect on many things and feel blessed that I am now on a more even -- if that's the right description -- path. I don't feel so out of whack anymore and that is a good thing.

The last year has been quite surprising and upsetting, but ended up being so good. We live in a suburb of Columbus, OH and the kids -- all of us -- are very happy. Mike has a job he enjoys working for a company that values family, and he travels quite a bit. After the last two awful experiences in his career, he feels lucky to have this job. He marvels at the number of employees who have been with this company 20, 30, or even 40 years in a part of the country where there are other jobs available. However, going through the awfulness and despair of having to leave my parents yet again, 15 years later and with my own children who they miss terribly, was sad.

In June, right after my mom finished her radiation treatments, she and my dad drove with me and the kids to OH. I was not looking forward to dropping off the boys at Nana and Papa's house in TN because I knew it would be sad, but no visible tears were shed. My parents and I sorted through boxes while Mike travelled that week. One night at dinner Mom reflected, "I didn't feel sad when we left the children because they were happy and I knew they were in good hands." That was the first time she shed tears through all her bravery and turmoil of the past months. Some of you may read this and think I am a melodramatic soul, but I love my parents deeply. Being so close to them these past few years was good. Mothers want their children to know who they are, especially their experiences and lives before we knew them simply as 'Mom'. We learn about our fathers through their actions, and if we're lucky, through the stories they share.

We live in a neighborhood that is filled with children who play OUTSIDE and who run from house to house (usually ours) to play. The boys have fun hunting for bugs, playing with their toys, and riding bikes. We have all taken up bicycle riding as we live in a cycle friendly neighborhood. We've also attached a bicycle seat for Jojo for longer rides. The boys have an idyllic life filled with much less T.V. and Wii, and much more healthy outdoor activities. Maybe it's the summer climate here with more moderate temperatures that keeps kids outdoors. Whatever it is, it's wonderful.

The downside is dealing with some of the more "rough around the edges" kids -- the ones who demand food and drink and/or who don't clean up and/or who invite themselves to dinner and/or who wander in our house when the kids are all outside. Mike has had talks with the kids and made it clear what our rules are when they are in our house, and the "Miss Manners" in me has been slavishly reminding kids of "please" and "thank you" or "ask first before taking".

My wonderful mother-in-law got the ball rolling with Jojo's long overdue potty training this summer. I think she is the Potty Whisperer because she also successfully trained Christian. After eight years of diapers and boy messes and being in my 40s, I'm just about out of patience when it comes to dealing with the potty. I think Gaby really wore me out! We've not known of too many boys who marked their territory as Gaby did in the most unexpected places (toy boxes, for one). While Jojo has some accidents, as he did on aisle E13 at the local Target, I know we are on our way to getting where he needs to be soon.

Christian and Gabriel started school last week! Christian is in 2nd grade and Gaby is in kindergarten. Gaby is on an alternating two-day per week and three-day per week schedule. After his first day of kindergarten last week Gaby told me, "I made a fwend at school and his name is Weagan. I asked him if he would be my fwend fow-evah and evah and he said, 'yes.'"

Christian walks Gaby to his class now. This morning we walked to school and Gabriel told me that I did not need to walk him inside because his big brother could take him to his class. Christian is a good big brother who watches out for Gaby.

Here are a few things we've been up to this summer: